I have a really bad feeling.. When I think about something,it's always for a reason. Usually, something happens extremely connected to the thoughts.. And I've been thinking about the death of a loved one;what it is,exactly,that I would do if I lost someone,and all that would become of me. Someone who meant alot to me. For me,someone with a fragile psyche,I'm almost always given time preimptively by a sixth sense to start preparing me emotionally for loss.. It may not seem so odd,but these gut feelings and ways I react without realizing how out of the ordinary they are until later.. There's always a pattern to them. The pattern of preperation says "loss of friend". I.. Don't want to lose anybody. Not again </3 I am.. Not ready. It'd destroy me right now T.T
..I'm afraid. I'm going to pray alot for them,because I know something will happen soon. I've been praying for some people lately,but now I won't let them leave me heart and mind again.. Not until this feeling is gone. I won't let them slip away because I didn't bother to watch out for them.. It's almost panick,frantic as it is,but it.. I won't let this defense mechanism psyche me out. I'll hope my strongest it is merely an illusory correlation. Please let these tangible words cause me to be wrong :(