My status on 4/1 and 4/2..

Well, I'll write this entry I found in my journal, logged on the first. It caught my attention, and I think it's interesting:
4/1

My speech was odd, though I dismissed.
Dismally, I don't need this.
So why? Why now; why today?
Why must I reside in this state?
There's so much to gain, with more to lose.
I have some forks, my path I must choose.
A tuning fork with two prongs,
success or much less.
Regardless I can make one sound,
then lost faith must be found.
Security in each mordern day obscurity;
I guess that's the style in which I walk,
and the strength I lack in the way I talk.
Not quite a shock.
I'll reach in my mind and remove it's block.
It's hindering me now;
I need to know how to escape this place,
emitting and aura of grace before it's too late
and I ran the race, and lost in my own due pace.
~~~~~

It wasn't my intention to write a poem. It just kinda came out that way.
4/2:

"I can't stop thinking about it. Those times; my dream. Him. I'm so hurt. So sad inside.. There's an unresolved conflict that has settled in my chest. Nobody knows or suspects a thing. But I'm falling. Again! With no one on my side except my heart's lost desires."