I really like blogging~

Unlike youtube or something, I am actually able to write as much as I want without a limit. I don't have to worry about it boring people because of the length, or anything like that. So I can just write on and on about any particular topic that interests me :) It's very convinient. I can rant in peace ;3 I should thank somebody for this skill.. after all, without them I wouldn't be able to write to myself for hours without needing another person to be actively talking with. Then again, maybe not, 'cause that was kinda cruel. I'm listening to the song "The Middle" by Jimmy Eat World, and I really like it. Maybe it's not necessarily the actual music, but the lyrics. I sorta wish I had come across it in the way I did more recently awhile back. I never really took the time to listen closely to the words. I have a bad habit of writing songs off as cliche without putting to much attention into observing before I make a judgement. It used to be worse than it is now, but I'm still working on not making judgements too quickly about things.This song is really relaxing to me for some reason~
I love songs that make me feel like the emotion is being directed at me specifically, even if it is so general, it's obvious it isn't. I guess that's how many people feel, though.

My doctor's app. is tomorrow :\ I have mixed feelings in the anticipation.. that lump is still there x.x But I'll just continue ignoring it, and pretending it's not there :x lol
I can't wait til school starts again. I miss mah friends and such, and with a new start academically, I actually feel as if I want to succeed. So I'll put in some effort for a while, it's decided. There's not much left to distract me now.. I'm looking forward to graduating a bit.. I want to get away from this place and start over, make a new name for myself. Let people redefine me from what they see, not just see me as how they once knew me to be. I have changed.. If I could only get away, I could act how I truly am, and I wouldn't have to even consider the way it would effect things. It would be fun to move around and act different ways to see which best suits me, but I doubt it'll happen.

I'm kinda struggling with my heart right now.. I've been having dreams about all the people I had liked in the past. Two guys I know right now have told me they love me, and I don't know..